New year, new job, same mental illnesses

For the past few months a few areas of my life have completely changed. I have lost a lot of the things that usually bring me stability and keep me grounded, and I have also reached a turning point with my mental health.

At one point I was almost totally at a loss of how to move forward, and had lost sight of what made me the kind of person others would want in their life- I had lost sight of who I was entirely.

The people who love me helped me through this, but I still don’t really feel like the same person that I was. Sometimes I worry I won’t ever be the same. It’s really easy to dwell on that though when I haven’t had a job for months and have been spending most of my time entirely by myself.

It actually works out coincidentally well that as the (worst) year (of my life) is ending, I’m able to have a lot of fresh starts and positive changes in the new year. I have a new job, somewhere to live in London, and an intensive DBT course all starting in early - mid January. My therapist called it a rebirth.

Although I feel like I have more direction now, things still feel very in flux. Healthy choices each day is what I’m focusing on, and that may not look for me the way it does for other people. I’m not pushing myself and will continue to take things slowly, there’s no objective right thing to do and only what feels right and good for me.